Desire: The Source of Suffering
The Sanskrit word for ‘desire’ is ‘vāsanā’ or ‘kāmanā’ — to want, long, or hope for something. Desires are fundamentally of five types and are associated with each of the senses: the desire to see, the desire to hear, the desire to smell, the desire to taste, and the desire to touch. Throughout the Vedic scriptures, desire has been singled out as the worst mental affliction. The Ramayan, one of the key scriptures of Hinduism, states: “If you satisfy desire, it results in greed.”
If one person was to get all the wealth, fame, luxuries, and sensual objects available in the world, even then, that individual’s desires will not be satiated. This is echoed further by Bhagwan Swaminarayan in his primary teachings, compiled in the Vachanamrut, where he says: “No one has ever been fulfilled by indulging in desires, and nor will anyone ever become fulfilled, for there is no end to desire.” Knowing that indulging in our desires is paradoxically the very cause of misery in our lives, the wise should renounce desire.
The Vedic scriptures compare worldly pleasures to the like of ‘a mirage seen by a deer’, or what they call mriga-trishnā. The sun’s rays reflecting on the hot desert sand create an illusion of water. Seeing this, the deer is fooled by the illusion that there is water ahead, and so, it runs to quench its thirst. Its dull intellect struggles to realise that it has been made the victim of deception. The more it runs towards the water, the further the mirage recedes.
Yogiji Maharaj, the guru of my guru, used to share a fable of a man who had a hundred camels. After a tiring journey through the desert, the man decided to rest with his camels. One after another, he got the camels to lie on the ground so that they don’t wander off. As he got to the hundredth camel, he struggled to make it get to the ground. Frustated, he let out a loud shout and tugged on the camel’s tail and it instantly fell to the ground. At that very moment, the other 99 camels that were already on the ground got up! Yogiji Maharaj used this anecdote and compared it with the pleasures and problems of this world. He used to say that as one problem is resolved, another 99 are bound to crop up. He said that this is the very nature of the pleasures and problems of this world.
In the Shānti Parva book of the Mahabharat, there is a popular story about ‘the blind well’. It goes something like this. Once a prince went to the forest to hunt. Suddenly, a tiger attacked him. The prince fell down from his horse. As he had no bow or weapons to arm, he quickly ran to save himself. Whilst running, his foot got stuck in some weeds and he fell into a dry, dark (blind) well. As he was falling, he managed to grab hold of two tree branches that were luckily hanging over the edge of the well. He looked up and he saw the tiger growling over from the top of the well. He was accustomed to seeing in the dark, and so, when he looked towards the edge of the wall, he saw two rats — one black and one white — slowly nibbling at the branches his life was hanging on. He feared, and knew deep down, that very soon the branch would fall to the bottom of the well.
As the prince looked down into the well, he was frightened to see many snakes hissing and showing their fangs. Suddenly a drop of honey fell on his face. As it rolled down, he stuck his tongue out to relish the sweetness of the honey. He looked up to see that there was a honeycomb between the two branches that were practically his lifeline in the moment. As he gently shook the branch to try and get some more honey, bees started to sting him. Forgetting that the tiger was arching over the top of the well, the snakes were hissing at the bottom, the rats nibbling at the branch, and the bees stinging him, he simply adjusted his tongue to get as many drops of honey as he could. His sole focus remained on the honey. He was happy indeed. He didn’t want to think about the precarious situation he was in. He was lost in the sweetness of the honey dripping into his mouth. So what was going to happen to him?
It’s obvious. When the branch collapses after the rats have nibbled through, he would fall to the bottom and be finished off by the snakes. This analogy, shared in the Mahabharat, perfectly explains the human predicament. The prince represents us. We are stuck in the dark, stingy well of this material world (māyā). Death (the tiger) is constantly chasing us, it will not leave until it devours us. The black and white rats nibbling away at the branch (time) represent night and day respectively. The hissing snakes represent the major problems we face in life. The bees represent the small day-to-day problems that we just deal with and don’t give much attention. But what about the sweet honey we desire? These are the pleasures we love indulging in. Whether that be seeking fame, acquiring wealth, indulging in palatable food, or whatever, we are all slaves to our desires. Due to these small drops of honey in the form of pleasure, we forget to discern between the truth and untruth and face the reality of life. This story has a deep meaning to it, and I personally choose to contemplate on it on a regular basis. Maybe you could too.
John F. Kennedy was probably one of the most successful and inspirational presidents in American history. His mental stability and resilience during the thirteen fateful days of the Cuban missile crisis in October 1962 was truly remarkable. But we should not allow that shining moment hide the fact that, like all of us, he also had inner enemies haunting him and undermining his greatness. Kennedy told the British prime minister, in a moment of very uncomfortable honesty, that if he went without sex for a few days, he’d get headaches. This is a direct example of how most of us view lust. But before we condemn President Kennedy as a lustful addict, we should look towards ourselves. Do we not fall victim to our own forms of lust? Do we not know better and yet do the same?
In this direct form, Swaminarayan constantly emphasised on controlling lust, primarily to his sādhus. Nevertheless, he expected the control of all desires to be in all of his devotees. He said, “Lust, anger and greed are worse evils than devils.” We will explore lust in the broader sense to encompass desire. In fact, the Sanskrit word for lust is kām, and it is the root word for desire — kāmanā. Lust is the destroyer of peace in all areas of our lives. Lust for a beautiful person. Lust for someone other than that who we’re committed to. Lust for power. Lust for dominance. Lust for fame. Lust for what others have. A person who is enslaved to their urges is never free — whether you’re a painter or the president. How many stories have you heard of great men and women who end up losing everything, and in some cases end up literally behind bars, because they freely chose to indulge in their endless desires — whatever they may be?
A common form of lust is envy. This is the lust for what other people have, for the sole reason that they possess something. We are envious of one person, and they envy somebody else. It’s a never ending cycle. Surprisingly, we don’t simply want what other people have — we want to hold onto everything we have now and add theirs to ours. Let me share a small story with you. A farmer finds a magic lamp. He rubs it, and out of thin air a genie appears, who promises to grant him one wish. The farmer thinks about this for a little while. Finally, he says: “My neighbour has a cow and I have none. I hope that his drops dead.” As dumb as it sounds, you can probably identify with the farmer. I’m sure you can admit that similar thoughts have occurred to you at some point in your life.
Of all the emotions, envy is the most idiotic. Why? Because it is relatively easy to switch off. This is in contrast to anger, sadness, or fear. “Envy is the most stupid of vices, for there is no single advantage to be gained from it,” writes French novelist Balzac. In short, envy is the most sincere type of flattery; other than that, it’s a waste of time.
Many things can spark envy: ownership, status, health, youth, talent, popularity, or beauty. It is often confused with jealousy because the physical reactions are identical. The difference: The subject of envy is a thing (status, money, health, etc.). The subject of jealousy is the behavior of a third person. Envy needs two subjects. Jealousy, on the other hand, requires three: Prem is jealous of Shyam because he has just bought a new Audi. So, how do we curb envy? First, we must stop comparing ourselves to others. Second, we have to find our ‘circle of competence’ and fill it on our own. Create a niche where you perform best. It doesn’t matter how small your area of mastery is. The main thing to remember is that you are the king of the palace.
If you think deeply, you will come to find that most desires are, at the core, irrational emotions. The wise have known for millennia that real pleasure is about freedom from pain and agitation, and that this could only come with controlling their desires.
In the Bhagavad-Gitā, Krishna calls desire the ‘ever-present enemy of the wise… which like a fire cannot find satisfaction’. The Buddhists went on the personify the demon of desire in the figure of Mara. They said it was Mara who tried to tempt and distract Buddha from the path of enlightenment. Let’s agree that none of us are perfect. We all have biologies and pathologies that will, and do, trip us up at times. What we need instead is a philosophy and strong moral conduct — virtue, or dharma — to help us resist what we can, and to give us the strength to pick ourselves back up when we fail and try to do and be better. This is a topic we delve into in the third part of the book. Materialism is the literal manifestation of desire, and is also one of the most obvious examples of the modern-day egotistical epidemic. We want more things, but not just any old thing. We buy products that confer status and importance — expensive cars, jewellery, clothing, a nice house, or anything else that displays status, power, and sophistication.
I HAVE TO STOP YOU RIGHT HERE, I’M SORRY. THE REST OF THIS POST IS ONLY FOR SUBSCRIBED MEMBERS. WE GO ON TO TALK ABOUT THE CAUSES OF MATERIALISM IN TODAY’S SOCIETY, HOW IT AFFECTS YOU AND POSSIBLY YOUR KIDS TOO (IF YOU HAVE ANY)…
Originally published at https://vinaysutaria.substack.com.
